My Solution

September 1984
The “Word is out – I heard it today,
The schools are in trouble – or so they say,
With declining enrollment and low teacher pay,
Our future looks to be a bleak and dismal day.
The politicians wrote “A Nation at Risk”

Their solution to what ails us – tsk, tsk, tsk,
Those who have worked to study the schools,
Feel that we’re on board “The Ship of Fools.”
We’ve talked and talked and we’ve planned and planned,
But it all came out to be just scratching in the sand.
For the real solution to all education’s woes,
Is as plain to me as the nails on my toes.
The one common thing through all the reports
It shines through the rhetoric and all the retorts
Education is necessary for our “National Defense”
So – here is my idea – please don’t take offense.
We simply apply to the Army and Navy,
The Air Force and Marines and get part of their gravy.
We move to the Pentagon, the Department of Education
And soon we’ll be saving this great Nation
We add one more to the Joint Chiefs of Staff,
Just think about it – don’t sit there and laugh,
We’ll have equal opportunity to rise through the ranks
And all of the people will give us their thanks.
All of the staff would wear uniforms shiny and bright,
We’ll know that we are doing is fighting for the right.
Merit pay would go out the door,
You might have a general who sweeps the floor
Everyone would have his or her own rank,
And the
Budget would have dough in the bank,
Supplies would suddenly be abundant,

Begging for money would be redundant.
The cash is there for the bombers and M-X,
The government is always ready with those checks.
The money will come in thick and fast
Just think of the field trips – what a blast!
And no little kid would kick the teacher in the shin,
If the Service knows one thing – it’s discipline.
If they don’t do their homework – it’s into the Brig,
And absolutely no one would give a fig.
No one could disagree – they’d dare not,
For fear of being court-martialed and shot.
The U. S. O would come to entertain us,
We’d go on those field trips in a camouflaged bus,
We would march around the school and salute the flag,
I think it would work – I’m not being a wag.
And after putting in our thirty years
Just think of the retirement my dears.
I think we could our status regain,
By joining with the Armed Forces, using our brain,
Our schools would a delightful place be
If only the reformers would listen to me!

A Therapy Poem.  Once again in reaction to the politicos who think they know everything.